God (without believing in him…or them? …is there actual more than one, or, can there be more than one, like, what if there’s one for every milky way – or one for every planet, or every single star??? Tough one, huh? Oh! Aha…maybe God knows!), everything we do usually starts with a question. Starting from early morning till the very last minute before the head hits the pillow one moment to sleep.
My very very first, usually quite rhetoric and repeated question, is ‘do I get up, or do I fry the alarm-clock?’ I answer with an almost destructive hit on the snooze-function. Of course. But nevertheless, even before I’ve opened my eyes there’s a question. Other times I’m that tired to phrase those long complicated questions, that I have to start with a more straight forward one like ‘Really??’ (followed by ‘SLAM’ with a right hand).
You get up. Wondering if your legs are up on the same time to be able to drag your body to the shower making the detour to the kitchen first putting the kettle on (hehe, the kettle, who still uses a kettle and not a boiler?). You turn on the water in the shower, and despite turning on the hot one first (and only) you ask yourself ‘why is it cold?’ or in my case ‘why is it so goddam bloody hell fcking freezing who wants to kill me, cold???’
And then you go through a day of questions:
- what am I gonna wear? How’s the weather? What would be ‘smart’ to wear in this weather? (this applies best to the population on the Northern part of the planet – or the south one, or the one on Mount Everest)
- Where’s the bread? Did I run out of bread? But I bought some? Didn’t I?? (some questions don’t go alone, and are usually answered by a flood of other questions)
- Where’s that bus? It’s late. Isn’t it? –checking the clock- it IS late! WHERE’S THAT BLOODY BUS? (frustrated questions, but still, a question)
- You’re ordering a croissant at the metro shop and again you’re overwhelmed by questions; would that be a croissant with butter? ‘no thanks’, chocolate? ‘no’, with almonds ‘noooo-Eh! Thanks. Just a regular croissant. Please’ (eyes checking the ceiling, as you’re wondering if you’re running out of time to make it…in time)
- At work you don’t only get questions from your boss, but by e-mails, phone calls…all day long. You are becoming an answer-machine kinda thing, asking yourself ‘Am I an answer-machine?’ …hmm…
- You go online thinking you need a holiday soon. Where do you wanna go? Where are you traveling from? When would you like to go? When do you wanna go back? Would you like a hotel included? Breakfast? Insurance? Lost Luggage insurance? Health insurance? Third party insurance included? Would you like a car? An elephant??? How do you pay? (please note you can’t pay cash online) (maybe next post should be about clauses…?)…work is less complicated than this…so,
- You go on to the news papers and read all the extra ordinary super inflated articles made by another eager ‘this-story-must-make-me-THE-journalist-of-the-day’-charactiristic, making you pop questions while you’re reading it; ‘why am I reading this?’
- Lunch-time; how would you like your sandwich, white bread or brown bread? Ok, what would you like inside? Salad? Tomatoes? With pickles? To go or eat here? And the coffee??
- Before end of day, you need to have the dinner-question solved…and you know, it's still not the LAST one...
And so the questions go on all day long, day in year out.
Just looked up Question on dictionary.com:
“1, a sentence in an interrogative form, addressed to someone in order to get information in reply.”
Ok, that sounds like a question alright. Doesn’t it?
Moving on to example 13 of explanations of ‘Question’:
“13. to make a question of; doubt: He questioned her sincerity.”
To what??? I’m sorry, HE questioned HER sincerity??? WTF!
…and so questions will be never ending. Obviously.
Finally, beyond many questions, we ask ourselves what’s that meaning of life?
I got an answer to that one, as a professional question-maker. Ahem, let me put this in a nice you’re-not-stupid-cos-you-wouldn’t-know kinda way, but…:
God damn answering them bloody million questions a day, is what life is about!
Now you can at least stop asking yourself that one.
And so where did I go since Christmas? Why haven’t I been here for so long? Why am I back now, not yesterday or tomorrow?
And I can ask myself, why is no one reading this anymore?...
Nite ya all…
(but am I going to bed, or did I just say nite to make you THINK I was? hmm?)
My very very first, usually quite rhetoric and repeated question, is ‘do I get up, or do I fry the alarm-clock?’ I answer with an almost destructive hit on the snooze-function. Of course. But nevertheless, even before I’ve opened my eyes there’s a question. Other times I’m that tired to phrase those long complicated questions, that I have to start with a more straight forward one like ‘Really??’ (followed by ‘SLAM’ with a right hand).
You get up. Wondering if your legs are up on the same time to be able to drag your body to the shower making the detour to the kitchen first putting the kettle on (hehe, the kettle, who still uses a kettle and not a boiler?). You turn on the water in the shower, and despite turning on the hot one first (and only) you ask yourself ‘why is it cold?’ or in my case ‘why is it so goddam bloody hell fcking freezing who wants to kill me, cold???’
And then you go through a day of questions:
- what am I gonna wear? How’s the weather? What would be ‘smart’ to wear in this weather? (this applies best to the population on the Northern part of the planet – or the south one, or the one on Mount Everest)
- Where’s the bread? Did I run out of bread? But I bought some? Didn’t I?? (some questions don’t go alone, and are usually answered by a flood of other questions)
- Where’s that bus? It’s late. Isn’t it? –checking the clock- it IS late! WHERE’S THAT BLOODY BUS? (frustrated questions, but still, a question)
- You’re ordering a croissant at the metro shop and again you’re overwhelmed by questions; would that be a croissant with butter? ‘no thanks’, chocolate? ‘no’, with almonds ‘noooo-Eh! Thanks. Just a regular croissant. Please’ (eyes checking the ceiling, as you’re wondering if you’re running out of time to make it…in time)
- At work you don’t only get questions from your boss, but by e-mails, phone calls…all day long. You are becoming an answer-machine kinda thing, asking yourself ‘Am I an answer-machine?’ …hmm…
- You go online thinking you need a holiday soon. Where do you wanna go? Where are you traveling from? When would you like to go? When do you wanna go back? Would you like a hotel included? Breakfast? Insurance? Lost Luggage insurance? Health insurance? Third party insurance included? Would you like a car? An elephant??? How do you pay? (please note you can’t pay cash online) (maybe next post should be about clauses…?)…work is less complicated than this…so,
- You go on to the news papers and read all the extra ordinary super inflated articles made by another eager ‘this-story-must-make-me-THE-journalist-of-the-day’-charactiristic, making you pop questions while you’re reading it; ‘why am I reading this?’
- Lunch-time; how would you like your sandwich, white bread or brown bread? Ok, what would you like inside? Salad? Tomatoes? With pickles? To go or eat here? And the coffee??
- Before end of day, you need to have the dinner-question solved…and you know, it's still not the LAST one...
And so the questions go on all day long, day in year out.
Just looked up Question on dictionary.com:
“1, a sentence in an interrogative form, addressed to someone in order to get information in reply.”
Ok, that sounds like a question alright. Doesn’t it?
Moving on to example 13 of explanations of ‘Question’:
“13. to make a question of; doubt: He questioned her sincerity.”
To what??? I’m sorry, HE questioned HER sincerity??? WTF!
…and so questions will be never ending. Obviously.
Finally, beyond many questions, we ask ourselves what’s that meaning of life?
I got an answer to that one, as a professional question-maker. Ahem, let me put this in a nice you’re-not-stupid-cos-you-wouldn’t-know kinda way, but…:
God damn answering them bloody million questions a day, is what life is about!
Now you can at least stop asking yourself that one.
And so where did I go since Christmas? Why haven’t I been here for so long? Why am I back now, not yesterday or tomorrow?
And I can ask myself, why is no one reading this anymore?...
Nite ya all…
(but am I going to bed, or did I just say nite to make you THINK I was? hmm?)
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